Tag: Purpose

Dear Diary – Do I Miss You?

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I used to be a journal keeper.  It’s where I turned to process and reflect.  To deal with big questions and emotions.  It was my place to connect with “me,” and it was such a part of my life that I didn’t think much about it.  Until it stopped.

It was never a daily practice.  I definitely experienced many lulls and pauses in my journaling.  But nothing like recent years.  Granted, the timing of my lack of journaling does seem to coincide pretty much exactly with parenthood.  There have been seasons of these mama years when there just feels like no time at all.  And when I’ve crawled out of those times, journaling just hasn’t taken priority.  Since my life seems to be a never-ending game of picking what I’d like to be doing with it, this choice to not turn to journaling is interesting.  Does this mean I’m not prioritizing myself?  Am I not taking the time for a practice that used to help me find my center and feed my soul?  Or have I simply moved on to other ways of connecting?  These questions nag at me, and I let the idea that I haven’t journaled make me feel guilty.

In recent years there have also been some silly overthinking reasons for my journal hesitations – Are all these journals just more clutter and more to haul if we move?  What’s to become of these when I die – will they be a burden to somebody or something I’d rather someone not read?  It’s strange and deflating to think these questions would prevent me from journaling, but they’re there in my head.

Whenever I read or hear about writers and their daily writing practices, I get an ache.  Writing, whether it was school papers or journaling or letter writing or even texting, makes me happy.  I don’t know that I want to *be* a writer (whatever that means), and yet, here I am – writing this post.  So, I am a writer, am I not?  Is a writer someone who writes or someone who is read?  Either way, I came to a realization today that this, here, is my writing space.  It’s not exactly the same as a journaling process, of course, but it is still a place for me to write and reflect.  To ask questions and process some of what I’m feeling.  I love the idea that on a blog there is potential for my words to reach someone else and possibly give them a boost or an idea, but mostly I recognize this space as mine.  This is my 40-something journaling.

So, Diary, do I miss you?  Not really.  And I’m starting to feel okay with that.

 

 

The Actor’s Life: A Survival Guide

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The Actor’s Life: A Survival Guide (2017)
by Jenna Fischer

I am not an aspiring actor.  But I picked up this book because I love listening to the Office Ladies, and the more I hear from Jenna Fischer, the more I realize we share a lot of similarities.  I don’t usually listen to audio books.  Like, almost never.  But, our library only had this as an audio, and so I gave it a try.

I loved it!  It’s read by Jenna, which I think is a very important piece of a good non-fiction audiobook.  And even though she does offer really great tips and advice for actors, I found so many important life lessons in here for myself.  It was enjoyable and enlightening, and I honestly view actors differently than I used to.  But most importantly, it is helping me with many of my creative hang-ups and blocks.  I highly recommend this book, especially to actors and creatives.

Jenna Fischer deftly weaves her own story in with some really great practical advice for actors.  It never focuses too much on her life, but it also gives the reader plenty of looks into what she was doing before, during, and after The Office.  (And I love hearing these stories!)  Her words of wisdom for actors never come across as preachy or belittling; in fact, she openly admits she wishes she had followed much of this advice in her own journey.  She is honest about the fact that there isn’t really a set path in an actor’s life, but that many of her tips can at least help pave the road for being ready for opportunities.  I love that she includes interviews/stories in the back of the book from four different actor friends as well, to drive home that everyone’s journey is unique.

So, I’m not completely naive about the entertainment world.  I was never in it, the way some are, but I grew up near L.A.  My dad worked in the entertainment business, and I’ve been on a set here and there.  On the outskirts, I’ve been to events, and I even worked for a writing agent in Hollywood one summer.  I lived in the L.A. area for a year as a young adult and met people in the business and many trying to work their way in.  Still.  After listening to The Actor’s Life, I realize how many general assumptions I have been making about actors.  When I don’t see an actor in any films or TV for awhile after they’ve been in something “big,” I have always, always assumed this was by choice.  I admit, I even say a “Good for Them!” thinking they’ve chosen to embrace some quiet life instead.  As if this choice –my choice- is preferable for them.  Jenna discusses just how brutal this business can be.  Actors can land a big break and then not get cast for years, despite a desire to keep on as a working actor.

And as for the pay?  Yeah, I’ve been cynical about that too.  First of all, California, and L.A., specifically, are expensive places to live!  So, salaries are generally higher for many professions.  Then, Jenna explains the 10% off the top that goes to an agent, 10% to a manager, and, of course, taxes.  This is not to mention the years of classes and headshots and driving to and from auditions and sets.  The 23 minutes of a show we see as the audience does not include the many hours of prep and rehearsals and reshoots and so on.  (To be fair, Jenna Fischer really didn’t linger on the financial aspect all that much (other than to remind actors not to get into the biz for the money), but it was something that really struck me while listening.).
When I was a school teacher, I remember how jaded one of my co-workers was about the fact that the guest art teacher made about as much in an hour as we made in a day.  I knew even then, that there was more to it than that.  The art teacher didn’t have the steady work we had.  She had a unique training and skill set we didn’t have.  She had supplies and prep and clean-up we didn’t have.  Not to say there weren’t elements of this in our teaching jobs, and not that we were receiving the pay we deserved (ha!), but I got it.  It’s like the plumber who quickly fixes one thing and charges what seems like a lot.  We’re paying for his or her knowledge about what to fix and how to fix it, not for the actual time it takes. … I digress…  I, sadly, never gave actors this consideration before.  I was pretty cynical about the pay, and I’m grateful to this book for changing my mind, even though that wasn’t really one of the main points.  And while Jenna does offer “survival” tips for poor, aspiring actors, obviously the same tips can apply to sooooo many jobs and situations out there.  I remember while working as a teacher scouring the floor of my car in grocery store parking lots, looking for loose change so that I could buy some basic food items.

But, as I said, most of what I took away from this book was not about acting or money, but about my own journey.  I love writing.  I love blogging and making my little videos about reducing and reusing.  And even though it’s in my heart, and I love doing it, there is a bit of a bummer element to it knowing that I am basically invisible on the Internet.  I don’t like the spotlight, and I don’t need it.  But, I work hard and put my whole self into what I’m doing, so it can be discouraging.  But Jenna talks about the years that some actors spend just seemingly waiting.  She relates to the frustration, while also encouraging action.  Her inspiring words about creating your own work, collaborating on projects that mean something to you, and knowing that it will pay off, was definitely a helpful and hopeful message.  I’d like to think if I was an aspiring, non-working actor that I’d be making my own videos and projects and living my passion.  So, wouldn’t I do that now?  What I am doing?  I know exactly what’s in my heart.  This is an amazing time in history when people can create and share with the world at the click of a button.  So, yes!  I love writing and blogging and talking about helping our environment.  So, what is all my internal whining about?  I’m doing what I love.  As the successful playwright in The Incredible Jessica James tells Jessica, “There’s really not much more to it than this.”  To get to do what I love from the comfort of my home without anybody’s permission?  Wow!  I’m going to embrace this.

Derek Waters (of Drunk History fame) wraps up his interview at the end of the book by saying this:

I was in tears.  The combination of hearing Jenna’s book and hearing those words was just what I needed.  Read this book.  It’s awesome.

Life Skills

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Life Skills (2021)
by Keilly Swift

This gem of a book teaches life skills like critical thinking, problem solving, communication, dealing with feelings, and so much more.  Each page is a beautiful map of engaging pictures and text, as well as many interactive ideas.

Full disclosure: I have not read this entire book.  It is chock-full of amazing material on each page that can be enjoyed and absorbed over and over.  This book is directed towards children, but my desire to own this book is not only for my kids, but for ME.  Reading these life skills laid out so openly and approachable is such a gift to the readers of this book.  This seems like a great book for kids in their pre-teen years, but it could easily be an interactive read with youngers, or as I mentioned, an enjoyable read for teens and adults as well.  The world needs more books like this!  I cannot praise it enough.

Programming with Purpose

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This is an amazing keynote talk my friend Ish gave in 2019 at Swiftfest Boston.  Swiftfest is a conference for iOS developers, but this isn’t a talk about formulas and code.  It’s a talk about Life and Goodness.  About breaking out of boundaries and fears and taking steps towards following our dreams.  It’s about enjoying life’s moments and not taking our loved ones for granted.  It’s about the actions we take that can change people’s lives.  And it’s about finding our purpose.

I know that in our rush society, people seem to want short snippets of videos and audio while they’re going about their days, so 25 minutes is an investment.  But–if I may–you owe it to yourself to watch this.  If you notice the tags below, this video covers just about everything.  (The original talk isn’t allowed to be posted, so I’m beyond grateful Ish has put this together.)

Ish has a way of speaking and thinking that puts people at ease and helps them tap into their true selves.  Even before I became close friends with him, he’d ask me how I was doing in such a sincere way, that I always stopped in my tracks to truly reflect and consider how I was, instead of resorting to the automatic, “Fine. And you?”.  He’s the guy people meet for the first time and feel like they’ve known forever.  People open up to him with stories and questions and conflicts and joys, because he really listens without judgement or assumption.  He helps people through their problems, not by giving advice, but by listening to what they say and holding the space for them to find their own conclusions.  I can say with absolute certainty, I would not be where I am today without him.

I realize I’ve digressed a bit, but I wanted to take a moment to share a little bit about Ish, because I am hoping it will inspire you to take a pause and watch this video.  A beautiful reminder about what is good in life and how we can help make it even better, just by being ourselves.