Category: Random

Thank You, Dana!

Posted on by keepinthesunlightblog@gmail.com

I didn’t set out in this new year for a cleaner home.  In fact, I had recently written a post about why I should just give in and embrace our cluttered home.  But, as a library and learning addict, I found an online event scheduled just two weeks into the new year for a live chat session with an author.  These are hard for me to pass up.  And she wasn’t just any author, she was a de-cluttering expert.  In the name of being prepared for this ultra-cool opportunity of an author talk (I’m just realizing some may think I’m saying this tongue-in-cheek, but I am, I assure you, 100% genuine), I checked out her book on audio to listen to while I did other things.  Not that it would make a difference, I knew, but why not give yet another cleaning book a read?

OH. MY. GOODNESS.  Not two minutes into How to Manage Your Home Without Losing Your Mind, I knew I had found my person.  Dana was speaking my clutter language.  I cannot tell you how many times I laughed out loud listening to her, not just because of her casual, entertaining approach, but because she was describing ME!   Finally!  As Dana says in the beginning, “Here’s the dirty little secret about most organizing advice: It’s written by organized people.”  Yes!  Exactly!  I’ve tried different books and different approaches.  The reason I wrote my Embracing Clutter post was because I felt like I just needed to surrender and accept my messy ways.  Nothing, and I mean nothing, seemed to work for me.  A tidy house just did not seem to be in the cards for me this go around.  I have tried.  I know we’d all feel calmer and better in a less-messy house, but I just couldn’t seem to do it.  So, it seemed embracing the mess was my only option.

I started Dana’s audiobook exactly two weeks ago.  I finished listening to it in just a couple of days.  We had people over last week, like it was nothing.  Our living room, our front hall, our bedroom, even our out-of-control kitchen table?  They are all consistently clutter-free.  I kid you not.  It is nothing short of AMAZING!  I fully realize we might be in the ‘honeymoon stage’ here, but it has NEVER been like this.  This is not to say there isn’t more work to do.  This is absolutely, 100% a journey, and an ongoing one at that.  But to have someone so similar to me describe her approach and process has been a complete game-changer for me.  I have so much gratitude.

So, just off the top of my head, here are some of the things Dana said that sound like me and that helped me have some Aha! moments:

–Dana sees potential in everything.  Yes!!  That’s me.  I like how she phrased this, because it is a positive trait to see potential.  As a passionate environmentalist and a lover of projects, stuff just comes with the territory.  In our house, things like empty jars, tin cans, broken objects…all of these are potential projects for me.  I save them with all the best of intentions.  Yes, the majority of people in this current world would see these as trash.  I get it.  I sometimes like to think I am living in another time, a time when people had to find creative ways to reuse what they had since they couldn’t just run out to the market on any given day.  I wanted to Save the World and make up for other people’s wastefulness by making the most of every single item that entered our home.  This is, and continues to be, one of THE hardest parts of de-cluttering for me.  I can send items to a thrift store like it’s nothing, but ask me to throw away old toothpaste caps?  With that, I will struggle.  But seeing potential in everything and having clutter everywhere means I get to do exactly zero of these projects.  Seeing potential in every little thing is a good trait.  It’s sweet, and I see the merit in trying to reuse and be creative.  And it’s not something I plan to fully give up.  But the clutter that it brings is overwhelming.  I know that I am creative.  I know that I do a lot to help make environmentally-good choices and share some of my ideas with others.  But I cannot keep every little thing.  Letting these go – seeing potential and then passing it along – that’s tough.  But it is making a huge difference for me and the state of our house.

–Dana talks about having a low clutter-threshold.  Had I not heard her explanation, this terminology would have confused me.  I would have guessed I had a high clutter threshold, since, like Dana, clutter quickly becomes invisible to me and I easily find ways to work around it.  But what she means is that she needs to live in a home with a minimal amount of clutter, otherwise it will be out of control.  There are some people who can collect items for future gifts or keep more sentimental items, and they make it work.  They manage that amount of stuff and still live in a, well, livable home.  That is not me.  I, like Dana, have a low clutter-threshold.  I actually quite like cleaning and managing stuff, but when there’s too much of it, I just can’t.  And that is the #1 thing that’s made this journey so hard for me.  In the last two weeks, I cannot tell you how much stuff has left our home.  Dana recommends just getting it out the easiest way possible for donation.  I did take several boxes of books to a used bookstore (a wonderful one that donates the rest without me having to do anything!) and I did sell some stuff to a used kids’ stuff shop (they do not keep the rest for donations, but I promised myself I’d take anything they rejected straight to the thrift shop).  But I took boxes and boxes and bags and bags of stuff out of our home.  And there are still more waiting.  I want to get all of it out as soon as possible, because that little sneaky part of me I mentioned above that sees potential in everything likes to creep back in and whisper ideas to me.

–Dana talks about the “container concept.”  Our shelves, our drawers, even our houses themselves – these are containers, and we have to be able to fit the objects we want into these spaces without buying more and more shelves and containers.  I get it.  And I went a little dramatic, maybe, and got rid of two large shelves that just haven’t worked for me in awhile.  They have become stuff and junk collectors.  And as I got stuff out of our home, I realized I didn’t need all the shelves I had at one time collected and wished I had had more of.

–In the book, Dana also talks about a wonderful method of going through stuff.  It is definitely a “slow and steady” method, but it is fabulous.  Many of the organizing books out there suggest an ‘all-in’ (or should I say ‘all-out’?) approach of dumping out an entire drawer or piling up all like items to sort through them.  That might work for some people.  I’ve done this.  And, unfortunately, just days before starting Dana’s book I did one of these, so I’m still dealing with the aftermath.  Yes, I love the grand gesture of this method, and, yes, it is helpful to see all the items at once.  But, for people like me, the excitement of starting in this dramatic way quickly fades.  Life happens.  Dinner happens.  Fatigue sets in from staring at the overwhelming mound.  And then it sits there.  And it is VERY discouraging.  Dana recommends a very different approach.  A one-item-at-a-time deal.  This sounds like it will be mind-numbingly slow.  But, it truly works.  It’s an incredible feeling to deal with each object as you see it, and then…BE. DONE. with it.  Whether you’ve got five minutes or five hours, what’s done at the end, is done.  Wahoo!  Bonus for me, is that by putting away each object as I go through it, I get a lot of movement and extra steps in my day.

–I’m embarrassed to admit to this one, but Dana does, so I will too.  She talks about having a bit of a hero complex.  I’m not even in that many social situations, but- Does part of me think it would be super awesome that if somebody suddenly needed a collection of jar lids for a project that I could step in and hand over loads of them?  Yes.  Yes, I do.  But the truth is, people figure things out.  The other truth is that when things like this have come up,  even in very small ways, I often can’t find the item I would have felt so smug about having.  So, really, this is not a valid reason to keep things.  I know.  It’s obvious.  But it sure helped to have Dana lay it out for me.

–Dana talks about clearing visible spaces first.  Oh, my goodness.  I feel like I should have figured this one out on my own, but it really didn’t occur to me until I heard her say this.  Like many people, I was digging into closets and cluttered spaces to start my clean-out.  Firstly, those are the big, scary projects.  They’re overwhelming.  I avoid them, or I start them without finishing.  Why not start with the spaces we see everyday?  The spaces where we live.  Not only is this so much lovelier to enjoy, but it also builds on the inspiration to keep going.  This concept was huge for me, and I love waking up and walking into our uncluttered living space.

–I forget the term Dana uses for this, but it’s a time-estimation problem.  I actually bought a timer last year because I realized I had this too.  There are tasks that I am sure are going to take forever, and then I set the timer and realize they’re actually quite quick.  Then there are chores I’m sure I can squeeze into a much shorter amount of time, only to realize I have far underestimated.  Knowing the amount of time it takes to unload the dishwasher or fold the clothes or wipe down the sink are actually very helpful for me.  I realize I DO have the time to do these tasks.  They are fast and easy, and I love knowing that keeping our house clean won’t take up my entire day.  It’s manageable.

–And here was one of the biggest things for me.  Dana talks about how having a clean home helps give her time for projects she wants to do.  Ok, I will admit that I have had some very backwards thinking on this for quite a long time.  For one, I will sheepishly admit that when I would see clean homes I had a sour grapes mentality.  I theorized that the people who lived there just didn’t have as many fun, exciting projects that were consuming their lives.  Cleaning was their thing, and that was fine, but I wanted to spend my time in other ways.  Folding and putting aways clothes, picking up at the end of the day, regularly cleaning out…these all seemed like a waste of my valuable creative time when I had ‘better’ things to do.  But the overall truth was that living in chaos was eating up more time and energy than I cared to admit.  Not being able to find a clean pair of socks or a paper I needed.  Frantically picking up so somebody could come over or feeling the stress of a cluttered living room.  All of these things were actually taking away from the time I wanted to spend doing my ‘fun’ projects.  They were robbing my energy and making things more stressful than they needed to be.  By working on getting our life to a base level of clean and then spending the time to maintain this is opening up so much time for me already.

If you haven’t caught on, Dana has become a household name here.  My family is all very familiar with her, as I interject many conversations these days with, “Do you know what Dana says?”  I was amazed by how quickly our home looked different by removing clutter and by starting with the visible spaces.  I may have rattled on about embracing clutter in my previous post, but it sure feels great having a cleared, livable space.

And I absolutely love carrying these concepts into other areas of my life.  Using the one-thing-until-it’s-done method with my work instead of hopping around?  Wonderful!  Realizing my brain space cannot hold onto so many worries?  YAAASSS!  Doing the not-so-fun stuff of life so that I have time for the things I want?  Sounds like a good deal.  The lessons from this book are making a wonderful impact on all areas of my life.

So, Thank You, Dana!  I don’t think I fully realized how much I needed all of this.  Thank you for sharing your stories with those of us who, like you, have looked on, baffled, at others’ clean living spaces for years.  Thank you for helping me realize that we, creative-types, can not only keep a tidy home (while keeping our creativity), but can also benefit from it.  This has been a true gift, and I look forward to the continued positive changes in my living space.

Women, Weight, and Hollywood Delusion

Posted on by keepinthesunlightblog@gmail.com

Can I just vent for a moment about how women’s weight is represented on television and movies?  Yes, I know it’s ‘Hollywood.’  Yes, I know we’re to suspend disbelief for a lot of things that happen in TV and movies and that many of these productions are a space for their audiences to escape reality – a place where characters have funny, witty responses, where life is always interesting, and where loose ends are tied up in the time period allowed.  I get that.  But the way that women have been portrayed, and ARE portrayed, in these worlds has a long way to go.  And dare I say, has some pretty damaging effects.

Gone are the days of TV house mothers vacuuming and cooking in their best dresses.  Gone are the days of women on TV cracking jokes about how eating certain foods will go right to their thighs or hips.  Nope.  Somewhere along the line, it became ‘cool’ for female leads to be relaxed, eat loads of junk food, and act like strangers to exercise.  Of course, all of the women playing these parts are thin and healthy, energetic and entertaining.  Were we to watch an overweight, lethargic woman on TV eating pizza and dissing on health food, audiences would cringe and shake their heads in judgement.  But by trying to make these women seem relatable and ‘fun,’ instead of obsessed with dieting and hitting the gym, media outlets have created even worse issues for women.

Carl’s Jr.’s degrading commercial campaign objectifying women eating hamburgers is one of the earliest instances of this obnoxious trend.  If they showed women who did regularly indulge in those massive, fatty burgers, the ad campaign would have been over before it began (especially considering the stance of slimy, former executive, Andrew Pudzder).  If we want women to truly embrace eating what they want and feeling secure in their bodies, then can we please show a realistic picture of what these lifestyle choices would look like?  These women would be larger (aka “normal-looking”), and if they consistently ate the way many of these female TV characters ate, they’d also probably have some health consequences.  I don’t mean this as a judgement – I fully support that these characters get to enjoy tasty foods -but many of these fictional females are repeatedly making unhealthy food and lifestyle choices without any sort of balance.  Realistically, we’d see the effects of their long-term choices in their emotional moods, their energy levels, their bodies, and even other parts of their appearances, like their eyes or skin.  (For reference, these ads, shows, movies, have spit buckets right out of view for when the director yells, “Cut!”  This food is NOT being consumed by these women.)

There’s a long list of TV shows that have embraced this story plot of the gluttonous, but thin and beautiful woman.  Some of them are shows I really enjoy, but the message sent is an unfortunate one.  Grace Adler, the Gilmore gals, Leslie Knope, Liz Lemon, Jessica Day –  I’m sure many, many others, but I have a limited knowledge of TV –  These women love their takeout and junk food and sweets and it’s a big part of their characters to fully embrace this, while simultaneously being horrible at exercise and shunning the idea of eating healthy or even being able to cook a meal.  Do we have to swing so far away from the stereotypical 1950s woman in the kitchen in order to reach a happy medium?  Is it too uncomfortable to feature a woman who does enjoy cooking?  Can we show women eating foods that keep their bodies healthy, in addition to showing them enjoy indulgences?  Can these characters enjoy exercise without being overly-obsessed with it?  Although I kinda get what these shows were trying to do, I cringe to see this idiotic idea that women should eat freely, not obsess about their health, and still look crazy thin.

I recently re-watched Bridget Jones’s Diary, a movie and book I love.  The film starts with Bridget listing her weight as 136 and claiming that she needs to lose 20 pounds.  Yes, pounds, because why list her weight in British stones when we American women can hear the utter absurdness of this number and goal and feel bad about ourselves?  It’s not just that Bridget weighs a certain amount and has this strange goal for herself; the entire plot is centered around the fact that her weight makes her chubby and undesirable.  For reference, her height and that weight put her exactly in the middle of a normal BMI.  So, I’m sorry.  But, what?!  And the book is worse.  She claims to be 129 “post-Christmas” and says she’s “terrifyingly sliding into obese” when she checks in later at 130.  This book was written by a woman, who was also on the team of screenwriters.  Umm…

Then, there’s Father of the Bride 2.  Another of my favorite rom-com indulgences.  Cute, predictable, comforting, and starring Steve Martin – a perfect Sunday afternoon escape.  But when George Banks lists his daughter’s and wife’s 9-month weights as 128 and 132, respectively??!!  It is hard for me not to type an expletive here.  There were not one, but two women as screenwriters on this!  These weights, with their heights puts them directly in the ‘normal’ BMI range WITHOUT being 9-months pregnant!!  Depending on pre-pregnancy weight, a woman should usually be gaining 25-40 pounds in pregnancy, the higher end of that range reserved for those with low BMIs to start with.  These women would have been severely underweight and unhealthy if these were their 9-month weights, which probably would have made it very difficult for the pregnancies to occur in the first place.

And just to digress a little bit here, inspired by FotB2 – Women’s pregnant bellies in movies and shows are laughingly small.  I must bring up another Steve Martin movie, another favorite of mine, The Big Year.  His daughter-in-law being pregnant is a small side story, but she looks rail thin when announcing she’s 4 months’ pregnant.  And when she introduces (Steve) to her newborn, she’s the exact same rail thin.  Any woman over the age of 20 (and who doesn’t live in Hollywood) and has had a baby, knows that you’re gonna look pregnant for some time afterwards.  Weeks, months, years…whatever.

So, Huzzah to the idea that TV women should be able to enjoy food, and not just for comedic effect when they’re feeling down about a break-up or something ridiculous like that.  But, for the sake of, well, everyone, regardless of gender, let’s paint a realistic picture of that.  Let’s show people making healthier, balanced choices, or at least show the consequences of not doing that.  Like it or not, audiences take these shows and movies into their subconscious and carry them for life.  Young women may be seriously baffled by the fact that they can’t sit and eat piles of junk food, poke fun at people who use the gym, and then not look like Rory and Lorelai.   Screenwriters, directors, actors, producers – whatever gender you are, stand up for this!  This unrealistic picture of women is no better than the ones from the distant past.  We can do much, much better.

How an Extremely Claustrophobic Person, Like Me, Finally Got Into the MRI Machine

Posted on by keepinthesunlightblog@gmail.com

Here’s the thing – I love cozy little spaces that I make for myself and have control over.  I love book nooks and beds tucked sweetly into small spaces.  I’m forever trying to find a way to set up my desk or sewing area in a closet.  The snug, safe feeling of these spaces gives me a warm and happy feeling.  …However…  I am also EXTREMELY claustrophobic.  Like, to the point of having panic attacks in places most people wouldn’t think twice about.  Sometimes when I begin thinking about it, I even get a claustrophobic feeling just being inside our home or not being near an ocean.  The feeling is real and big and scary.

So, when I needed to get an MRI for a head issue, I was not a happy camper.  The issue wasn’t necessarily urgent…unless, of course, it was.  I wouldn’t know until I got the MRI.  I was scared out of my mind, and it initially took me three months, but I went in.  I’d found an “open MRI” in the area and was thrilled that this could be an option I could work with.  I listened to a meditation podcast; I’d asked a lot of questions ahead of time; I was ready.  The tech placed my head in the – let’s just call it what it was – cage, and started sending me into the machine.  I’d like to say I lasted two whole seconds in there, but I don’t think I got that far.  I screamed to be let out.  And that was that.  (For the record, unless I was going to be lying on my side, which I wasn’t, the “open” MRI felt more claustrophobic than the tunnel one – to me, at least.)

My nurse practitioner worked to get me a CT-Scan instead, which wasn’t fun (the contrast portion of the scan was the worst), but I made it through.  The great news was that everything looked normal!  The bummer news was that the neurologist listened to my issue and said I’d definitely need an MRI for a better picture and to make sure everything was okay.

And then, I found every reason on the planet to put it off.  Maybe I could ‘solve’ this problem on my own?  Was it just my imagination, or were things seeming better?  And then there was the Covid excuse.  I’d conveniently forget about making this appointment when numbers were low, and then when numbers spiked, I felt justified in putting the MRI off a little longer.  It wasn’t that I was casual about this procrastination.  Not at all.  I spent many, many nights suffering with head pains and panicking about all the unknowns.  But, to me, getting into an MRI machine felt like the equivalent of asking someone who is afraid of heights (me, also) to stand on the ledge of a very tall building while the scan was being performed.  It felt truly terrifying.

But when problems began occurring again, and with my worst-case-scenario mind, there was no way I could put it off any longer.  ONE YEAR after speaking with the neurologist, I finally took solid steps to make this MRI happen.  It really came down to my kids.  If there was something wrong, I had to find out before it was too late.

Here’s what I did to prepare:

–Early on, I spoke with one of my best friends who has had to have many MRIs for way bigger reasons than I was dealing with.  She was so wonderful though about listening to my fears and concerns and offering me the support I needed.  She explained step-by-step how an MRI typically went for her.  She offered helpful tips and thoughts and was a constant source of love and understanding through my whole journey.

–My NP had offered anti-anxiety medicine as an option from the beginning.  As somebody who can be skeptical about taking medication, I was strongly against this.  But more than that really, I had this fear that if I took medication that relaxed me enough to get into the machine, that I would later have terrifying flashbacks of being in there, as if I’d tricked myself into being okay with that situation.  I know it sounds strange if you’re not as claustrophobic as I am, but it was a real fear.   But, when I knew I was really going to put my best effort into doing this, I accepted the prescription.  She suggested I take one tablet ahead of time to see which dose was a right amount for me, but this idea did not thrill me.  I don’t like the thought of not being in control, and that’s what this sounded like.  BUT…I also didn’t want to go into the appointment and not be able to go through with the actual MRI.  So, I tested out a half a tablet three days before the appointment.  It didn’t seem to be enough for me to do this super-scary thing, so I added another half, and as I was singing myself to sleep, I realized I’d hit the perfect amount.

–I researched the MRI facilities covered by my insurance and found a good fit.  Besides my claustrophobia, the first facility I’d gone to was not a good match for me.  I didn’t get a good vibe from the people there, they had complete disregard for Covid safety at a time when they REALLY should have, and it wasn’t where I wanted to be for such a big thing.  I found a promising place and called to ask if I could come see the machine before the appointment.  Their willingness to let me do this was a great sign.  I wasn’t so sure as I sat in the waiting room.  My mind was ready to make excuses to put this off even longer, as much as I wanted it to finally be done.  But the tech who met with me was terrific.  He showed me the machine.  I took a picture of it and wrote down the model and make.  He talked about how the scan would go.  I asked my list of questions from my notebook.  It all made me feel like maybe, just maybe, I could do this.  I was sure to ask him specifically what days and times he worked, because even though he spoke highly of the other techs, I knew that going into this big, scary thing with at least some familiarity of a person I already knew I liked, would be very helpful.

–I did a lot of online research.  I searched for articles and posts (like the one I’m writing now) by people who were terrified of having an MRI and were able to do it.  I looked at lots of pictures of machines online.  Sometimes they didn’t seem so bad and I’d wonder what I was so worried about.  But then the thought of being inside would make me shudder.  It did help me start to visualize though.  I would also listen to noises of what it sounds like in the machine, because it wasn’t just the claustrophobic tunnel; it was the head cage and the loud noises and yes, of course, the results, that made me overflow with nerves and panic.

–I wrote down mantras and I chanted them over and over.  The kids were used to hearing me say these throughout the day.  I said them when I took my ‘practice’ medication.  These are what I would cling to during the scan.  (I kid you not.  My kids have a small expandable play tunnel, and I would practice lying in there and saying these mantras.)

THE BIG DAY

Here’s what I did on the day of the appointment:

–We only have one car and no babysitters, so that meant this was going to be a family trip.  In the car, at least.  My husband and the kids would wait in the car while I went in to do this.  I made sure there were snacks and water for the kids (Ok, actually my husband did that).  But I made sure that I had not one, but two gifts for the kids to give to me after my appointment – a book I’d been wanting and not letting myself look at until after this appointment and a darling cuddly dragon doll.  The kids had been so supportive, and I knew they’d be excited to give me these when I was done.

–I took half a tablet of my medication one hour before my appointment and the other half on the way there.  I had also cut one tablet into fourths and so I ended up taking another one-fourth when I got there as well.  I did not want to leave without having this MRI.

–I made sure to take my ring off ahead of time and I wore clothes with no metal, so that I could stay in my own comfortable outfit.

–I had found out from the tech during my meeting with him that they offer a little mirror placed on the head cage so that the person can see out.  YES!!  This was a game-changer for me.  I had called ahead of time to double-check this was an option and that I didn’t have to give extra notice about this.  Fortunately, the tech was so super great about making sure I was comfortable, making sure I had the mirror in place, re-explaining how everything would go and how long it would take, giving me ear plugs for the noise, showing me the emergency call button.  And then… it was time.  And, I. Was. Ready!

The Scan!

After all my fears about getting into the machine, I now thought of new ones.  I’d spent the night singing to myself while testing the medication and I’d just been singing to myself in the lobby (yes, I was that crazy lady).  But, I was told I couldn’t really make noise or move during the scan.  Oh, no.  What if my singing just came pouring out?  What if I was so relaxed that I fell asleep and my head moved or I started snoring?  eeps!

Fortunately though, none of that happened.  I had a sing-free, snore-free scan.  Whew!

It went quicker than I thought.  Not that it was fast, but after years of build-up, it really was only about 25 minutes.  I made a choice when I was getting sent in that I would not, WOULD. NOT. look up at the actual machine.  I looked at the mirror and my toes and the tech getting started.  But, after that, I just closed my eyes.  The noises were loud and each scan had a different strange set of sounds.  But, oddly (ahem, medication), my mind started picturing shapes and dances to each of these bizarre soundtracks.  I focused on my breath and said my mantras, especially as I was going in, but once it started, I didn’t even feel like I needed to rely on these.

Pretty soon the tech was wheeling me out to put in the contrast, and I knew then (from my many questions and reviewing all my notes several times and him reminding me) that I was now almost done.  The contrast was way easier than the CT-Scan contrast – thank goodness.  (No sensation of feeling like I’d peed myself.). And then, that was it!  I was out!!

Done!!

I was SO, SO proud of myself and SO relieved.

The next step, of course, was waiting for the results, which, I had really tried not to think about too much ahead of time.  Now they consumed my every thought.  And, of course, I got my scan on a Friday afternoon.  And, of course, it was a holiday weekend.  And, of course, my doctor’s office couldn’t post the results until my NP had looked at them and she was out of town that week.  But, I was finally able to log on to the MRI office’s site to see them.  And, thank you to the Universe and all that is Good, everything was normal.

Getting this MRI scan that most people would probably just check off on a lunch break was a huge, huge deal for me.  From the time I first talked to an NP about what was going on (We had recently moved and didn’t even have medical professionals in the area yet) to the time I actually got the scan was about two years.  I’m beyond grateful that my results were normal (not that we’ve necessarily solved what’s going on, but ruling out some major health issues is such an enormous relief).  And not carrying around the weight of this impending MRI scan is an incredible feeling.

So, this is the post I wish I could have read while gearing up for this, and I share it here now in the hopes that it can find its way to someone else who might be scouring the Internet like I was for some sort of advice on how a claustrophobic person can make it through an MRI scan.  And while I don’t know you or your situation, I want to let you know that I DO believe in you.  If this is a big deal for you, then your feelings are valid.  And maybe, just maybe, if an extremely claustrophobic person, like myself, can make it through, so can you!

Rubik’s Cube and Possibilities

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Last weekend I learned to solve a Rubik’s cube!  No, I am not a genius, and, Yes, I did use the YouTube to learn how to solve it.  Nevertheless, I’m quite proud of myself.  Our kids had received mini cubes in their Easter baskets, and that afternoon I just decided I was going to learn.  (Side note:  Do not learn on a mini cube; they are frustrating as heck to learn on.)

I grew up in the 1980s, so, of course we had a Rubik’s cube in our game cupboard.  I probably half tried it a few times, but I think I knew the task was out of my reach, so I never put much time or thought into it.  When the Rubik’s cube gained in popularity once more and YouTube was a resource, I still didn’t really care enough to try learning.  But, for some reason, magically, it was time. (Ok, ok. I’m procrastinating on a big project right now, but that’s besides the point.)

I went from being super amazed and proud at solving the cube at all to realizing I could do it in 5 or 6 minutes.  What?!  By the third day, my time was down to about 3 minutes.  And now, a week later and after combining two methods, I’m consistently under 2 1/2 minutes.  I’m certainly not a “speed cuber,” nor do I necessarily aspire to be (ok, maybe a little), but I’m feeling pretty rad about all of this.

But one of the coolest, unexpected side effects of learning The Cube is that I am looking at all the other seemingly difficult things I’ve wanted to learn or accomplish, and it all just seems so….possible.  Learn ASL?  Sure, I can do that.  Working towards my first-ever splits?  Yeah, I got that.  Knitting socks?  Of course.  Writing a book?  No problem.  Threading a Serger?  Why not.  Getting through another day of meltdowns and tantrums? Easy peasy.

There are 43 quintillion (!!!) possibilities on a Rubik’s cube.  Which is totally insane, right?  So, if I can solve that in less than 2 1/2 minutes, just think of all that I could accomplish.

Preserving Memories, Digitally

Posted on by keepinthesunlightblog@gmail.com

Somewhere along the line, I appointed myself as the family historian.  (Well, as one of the family historians – My dad has done incredible family research, which I’d be lost without, and both my parents have preserved so many family moments in pictures and videos.)  I don’t know why or when this happened, but I can’t help but spend free time researching family trees, scanning and organizing old photos, and digitizing old home movies.  It’s definitely a mixed blessing.  This can feel like a time-sucking hobby, for sure.  I also feel a strong urge to be recording my current family’s moments, as well as, you know, LIVING these moments.  But, since it’s part of who I am, I may as well embrace it, enjoy it, and try to be efficient in it.

One of the issues for me has been how quickly technology and systems change.  Just when I think I’ve found a good way to do something, a better system presents itself.  Ah, well.

PHOTOS

I started my journey as the family photo scanner.  I scanned countless photos over the years and have countless more that haven’t been touched.  (My family of origin REALLY liked taking photos.)  Here are some of photo scanning tips, from my experience:

–I know not everyone agrees with this, but if you’re dealing with massive amounts of photos, or even a moderate amount, I recommend only scanning the “star” photos.  I started by scanning EVERY. SINGLE. PHOTO.  Not only does this eat up scanning time and computer memory, but it’s just more to sort through and label.  And, frankly, there’s not much desire to even look at all of these, so why go through the trouble?  Not everyone has this “problem” of too many memories preserved in photos, so it may sound strange, but for those who are blessed with a lot of photos, this is my recommendation.

–When I did most of my initial photo scanning, I used a scan bed.  Now there are apps that make this process ridiculously simple.  I don’t have much experience with them, but I would definitely be using these if I was starting the digitizing now.

–I recommend labeling as you go, and labeling groups of photos, rather than individual ones.  I used to label each photo with who was in the picture and where it was.  Not to say this isn’t helpful, perhaps to future generations, but I just keep it simple for now.

Here’s how I label photos so they can be sorted in order–  YEAR-MONTH NUMBER (then) MONTH.  [Example:  1985-03 March]

When programs or computers organize in alphabetical/numerical order, this will ensure the photos stay in order.  Also, if you only know the year, you can still get photos into their general chronological order.  After that basic label, I then decide if I want to add details.  If years aren’t known, I try to group by decades based on the ages of the people in the photos.

–I also wish I had posted these into an online file storage site as I went.  At the time I started scanning, I was copying everything onto discs, and now I wish I had just been sharing and storing things online from the start.

SLIDES

We inherited quite a few boxes of slides, so I was very excited to find a way to convert them into digital format. I used a simple converter machine for awhile – nothing fancy, but it worked.  It actually seemed a bit flimsy at first, but it did what I needed.  Now as I revisit the lightweight machine years later though, I’m sad to say it hasn’t held up.  I’m trying to decide if getting a new converter is worth it for the remainder of the slides we have.  Our local library system has a Library of Things that loans out everything from board games to telescopes.  They finally got a slide converter in the system, but it’s checked out for months in advance.  Just requires a little patience and planning.

8MM TAPES

Researching how to convert 8mm video tapes took me FOR.EV.ER!  I finally figured it out and purchased an old camcorder and a VidBox and it’s been super easy ever since (just time-consuming).  The tapes do have to play and record in “real time,” but I find that if I’m doing other things and get a tape started, this doesn’t really matter.  Tips:

–My family of origin has Sooooo much footage.  I know this might not be a “problem” most people have, so some of this may sound silly to those who are happy to have the little bits of home video they do have.  For me, I find that it’s really helpful to transfer our footage into iMovie and do some editing.  There is no way my family is ever going to sit and watch the hours and hours of video.  Sometimes I edit these by events.  Sometimes I simply upload a short bit that would be fun to view and share.  I’ve got a clip of my brother at age 10 waving to the camera and saying “Hello” to his future kids, who are now that age.  How cool is that!  So, I uploaded that 15-second video by itself.  But, usually, I’ll edit a sports game or recital or holiday or trip as its own video.

–Sites like Sync, Google Drive, Dropbox, etc. are great for sharing old videos or photos.  You can organize into folders and share select links.

CURRENT

The tricky balance for me is keeping up with the current photos and videos, in addition to all those cool ones from my own childhood.  I know many people who take tons of photos and footage on their phones and then hardly look at it again.  I try my best to do something with the footage I take, but it’s tough.

–I regularly download photos onto my computer and organize/label by month.  (Nope.  I’ve finally caught up with the times and use synching iCloud)

–I delete the bad photos/videos or less-than-awesome ones.  (Hard to do with sweet kiddos in the pic, but worth it.)

–I (*try to*) regularly pick the best photos/videos of the month and transfer them to an online storage platform.

–Even with all the other digital chaos I’ve got going on, I always take a monthly photo of each child and load it to a file.  I also work very hard to make a short birthday compilation video for each child every year.  Having at least these makes me feel better that I haven’t organized the hundreds of photos and videos I take each month.

SHARING

For me, one of the best parts of all of this is sharing with other family members.  I know the photo/video sharing thing is crazy trendy on social media sites.  But since I don’t have the Twitter or Instantgram, I thought it would be fun to share old photos in a place where they can easily be accessed and categorized.  In the past I’ve put together discs, online storage files, and even private blogs.  I’m currently working on some online Family Trees for each branch of the family.  I may be the only one who actually looks at these, but I love having these as a reference, and someday, someday, someone from the family may be interested.  (I recently went to a virtual Genealogy conference, and I was so relieved to find some people who are just as dorky as I am about family history.  Huzzah!)

 

I’m working at realizing this is an ongoing process and not a project that I’ll get to just cross off my to-do list one productive Saturday.  I’m trying to enjoy the treasures of videos and photos I do find and share, instead of thinking about the pile of ones I haven’t gotten to.  I’m trying to remember that sometimes by preserving/digitizing a special handful of photos and videos rather than the whole massive pile, I can actually have the space to appreciate those ones more.  For anyone else in the rare position of having an overabundance of preserved family memories, perhaps you can relate.  But some of the methods above have helped me at least begin this journey, and I’m hoping that maybe some of these ideas can help someone else.