Home Learning

Posted on March 24, 2020September 21, 2023 by keepinthesunlightblog@gmail.com

I know we’ve got a world full of brand-new, “forced” homeschoolers right now. And, I know that everyone’s experience and approach during this time will be so different. There are some parents trying very hard to suddenly balance working from home while figuring out how to educate their kids and trying to stay calm amidst a wide range of uncertain emotions. Some parents might not be working from home right now but are scrambling to figure out how to keep their family afloat. Some parents might be excited at the opportunity to be home with their kids, but don’t know what to do all day.

There are students from preschool through college who are suddenly home-bound and families with very different ideas of what this time of schooling at home should look like. I really don’t want to make any assumptions about anyone else’s experiences right now or philosophies or abilities with this “homeschool” experience. So, this is not a “how to,” because I don’t know you or your family.

But, I would love to share some of my ideas and philosophies, which may or may not resonate for you.

When my husband and I made the decision to homeschool years ago, I thought I would totally rock it. I’ve taught many different ages in different settings, I have a master’s degree in teaching, for Pete’s sake. Teaching my own kids at home? No problem. Right?….Well, it has been a MUCH tougher journey than I anticipated. And, we are only two grades in!

But I like to think I’ve picked up a few things in my short journey so far, and I’d love to share with anyone who is willing to read them. I know that things may shift and change for our family as we go (in fact, that’s one of the biggest things I’ve learned– that things are constantly changing), but here’s what I’ve got so far:

–Home school is NOT school at home. I always believed this, but it’s taken me awhile to really KNOW it. The term “homeschooling” is misleading and strange. It is a completely different approach to learning than school and should not be treated the same. I like to say “home learning,” but perhaps somewhere there is a perfect term for it.

–There doesn’t have to be a strict schedule. Unless we absolutely have to be somewhere, there’s no reason I have to wake my kiddo up before she’s ready. Learning can begin when she is rested and, hopefully, happy.

–Learning doesn’t have to take place at a table and with a pencil in hand, and, in fact, it usually doesn’t. Learning happens when we’re snuggled on the couch together in a discussion, when we’re outside exploring, when she’s taken a flashlight to bed at night so she can read or write in her journal, when we spend the whole day reading together, when we’re at dinner asking big questions. It is always happening, but it’s not happening with worksheets and quizzes and essays. Teachers in schools need those because of the number of students they have and the time constraints they have. At home, we get to watch first-hand what our kid is learning.

–Rhythm and routine are good, but they aren’t everything. I’ve struggled for years to develop a daily rhythm, thinking that it would help provide a stability and grounding to our lives that would help us all. Turns out we have a kid who thrives on newness and mixing things up. She can stand a new routine for about a week, before she wants something new. I think there’s something comforting in a routine for most people, but I’ve decided to stop struggling to make it happen.

–I often feel like what I’m doing is “sneaky homeschooling.” I do a lot of reading and research and planning about what I’d like to cover for a school year. It’s constantly on my mind. And then, I am just present. When a question is presented or a project is happening where there is a learning opportunity, I slip it in. This is not to say that I make play or hanging out all into “lessons.” Fortunately, we have a kid who asks questions, loves stories and explanations, and has a great ability to connect and remember. If she senses I’m trying to squeeze in a lesson, I can tell, because she shuts down. It’s a fine balance, but it’s the best homeschooling tool I know right now.

–Planning is fun, but our days rarely end up the way I planned. I would say a very good portion of the time, our daughter takes whatever idea I’ve had for us and makes it her own. And, in truth, it’s usually better. Homeschool is not about a power struggle or showing who’s in charge (I’m trying my best to remember on many a frustrating morning), it’s about learning together.

–Any topic can be a starting point for almost any subject. I like to start with what our daughter is currently enamored with and use it to my advantage. She LOVES horses right now and is a big fan of a horse YouTube vlogger named Esme. So, we wrote short little bits about Esme’s animals, thinking of an adjective and verb that started with the first letter of each name. “Troublesome Toby trots.” And so on. It was fun and she was completely engaged. She made a book with illustrations, and it just felt like we were playing. And horses can be a gateway to science, history, geography, music, art, math, and so on. Any topic can be. Just takes a little brainstorming and possibly Googling.

–Surrender. Surrender. Surrender. When little brother is knocking books out of our hands or one or all of us is crabby, it’s just time to let go. To go for a drive, run outside, watch a movie, take a nap (Yeah right, I wish!), have a snack, and just take a break. I’m trying my very best to learn that our interactions and moods and sanity are more important than any math lesson or activity.

–PJs are fun, but too many days of PJs can really drag us down. I always hear about public school families enjoying a PJ day at home on a snow day or school holiday, and I kind of miss the fun feeling of that, because pajamas during the day are fun until that’s the norm. I like to get dressed in “real” clothes every morning and wear a pair of “inside” sneakers before we jump in to the day. I always feel better when I do.

–If our kid is resisting learning something, I (try to!) let go and then start exploring it myself. I’m not going to sit down with a journal right in front of her and narrate out loud how much I just LOVE writing. Kids are way too smart for that. But, if a kid doesn’t want to read, make sure they see YOU enjoying reading. Not just reading to them but reading for your own enjoyment. If a kid doesn’t want to learn to read, why don’t you start learning a new language? Let your kid see you struggle to figure out how to read and write a new language, because-HINT-that’s exactly what they are trying to do! If your kid doesn’t want to write, think about how often she sees you writing. Does your kid hear you saying how much you disliked math when you were in school, or does she see you scribbling down and calculating fractions as you try to double a yummy recipe? We all know the best way to get someone to learn is through example, but it’s easy to forget.

–Connection with others can be tough in the homeschool world. Socialization is the cliche complaint or concern about homeschool, and every single homeschool book I’ve read has very big claims about how false this is. True, kids in public school are usually only with kids of the same age group and often have to sit quietly in school. And, yes, homeschoolers often have more opportunity to play with other kids during the day, interact with different ages, and so on. But, it just feels a lot tougher to connect as a homeschooler. At least for us it has. The philosophies and approaches and reasons homeschoolers have for doing what they’re doing are often quite strong. They can be exclusive in their groups or anti-social themselves. It’s interesting that just as I was feeling like a bit of an outsider in the outsider world of homeschooling, the whole world suddenly became homeschoolers too…

So, the best we can all do is our best. Focus on our families and what works for us, while trying to support each other and share inspiration. I got a bit uneasy last week when, after years of being in our isolated homeschool world, suddenly photos of happy, enthusiastic new homeschoolers were flooding the Internet. What did they figure out in a day that I still feel like I’m struggling with? And then, I remembered. Those are just photos. That’s their journey. My job is to focus on ours. And so, we continue on. Doing the best we can and figuring it out as we go.

The Brave Learner

Posted on March 19, 2020July 3, 2020 by keepinthesunlightblog@gmail.com

The Brave Learner
by Julie Bogart

A few months ago, I remember wishing I had a veteran homeschool mother to talk to. Someone who had made it through the journey and could offer me the comfort and wisdom that all of this really would work. That we hadn’t ruined our children by not teaching the standards and keeping to the schedule. That we would be ok, even if we didn’t ever quite perfect the housecleaning schedule or meal plan. That even if we broke down into not-so-great versions of ourselves in a ludicrous effort to “help” our kids be forced into better versions of THEMselves, that we would still be ok.

Granted, we are at the beginning of this homeschooling journey and this book only just came out recently. But, I feel like it’s what I’ve been searching for all along. I come away from reading it feeling more peaceful about homeschooling, but also about our whole parenting and adult journey. I almost feel like if I do little else with my kid for the next few weeks but really take in this book, it would be time well spent. But, of course, learning is always happening, and that’s part of what I love about this book. It’s almost like it’s giving me permission to do what I’ve felt in my gut is right all along. The lengthy conversations and explanations our daughter begs for. Storytelling and asking questions together. Playing and reading and supporting the kids in following through with their ideas. Even though I feel like a very relaxed, flexible homeschool mama, my former life as a teacher, and, frankly (as much as I say it doesn’t) societal expectations, often get in the way of me just following my gut.

The Brave Learner will be a touchstone during this homeschool journey. And I am overjoyed to discover all the other resources Ms. Bogart offers. Her Brave Writer program, her podcast, her poetry teatime, for goodness sake. I cannot recommend this book highly enough!

Coronavirus–Kids at Home

Posted on March 17, 2020January 23, 2021 by keepinthesunlightblog@gmail.com

Lots and lots of kids are spending lots and lots more time at home right now. And without getting into all the emotions and concerns and craziness of the current reality, I know that this kids-at-home thing is a very new thing for a lot of people.

As homeschoolers and living in a new place, our day-to-day is a lot of time at home and together. A LOT. So, there is a little bit of weirdness to suddenly hear people entering what’s been our reality for the last seven years. I wish I could say I was some sort of expert at staying calm and sane and thriving being home all day with kids, but that is, sadly, not the truth. It’s something I feel I am constantly working at.

I do know there are basic things that need to happen for sanity. I don’t always feel like I do them all or do them all well, but I’ll just give my quick list:

–Get outside! Alone and together. Even if it’s standing on a front porch or balcony to take a breath. I always think I need to plan a bunch of “fun” activities for the kids outside. I love collecting ideas and making lists. But the big truth, for us anyway, is that our kids always come up with way better stuff in the moment than I ever could have planned. If we can get past the enormous battle of clothes and socks and shoes to step out the front or back door, then we are in business.

–Eat well. Stress eating is a very real thing, and bad eating can quickly lead to a downward spiraling mood. I know available fresh food is at a premium, but the best choices possible right now will help everybody’s health and emotional well-being.

–Alone time is key. If your kids are anything like mine and will barely let you go to the bathroom alone, then this can be a challenge. Some parents can miraculously wake up a bit before their kids to squeeze in alone time. Our kids wake whenever I do with almost no exceptions. But sneaking away for a shower or a breath outside or a phone call can be sanity savers when they’re possible.

–Together time is also important. Sometimes I feel jealous of parents who work away from home, imagining that they can devote their full attention to their kids when they are together in a way that I just feel I never do. I know that isn’t true, but I do remind myself that I need to just go all in at certain points during the day and really BE THERE. Not doing dishes or trying to get work done or trying to respond to a text or trying to see what’s going on in the world, and just really be present for Legos or dolls or board games or reading or whatever is going on. It’s not only important to have that connectedness, but, for us anyway, it truly shifts the kids’ moods away from tantrums.

–Movement/exercise is also very important. I know with gyms closing their doors this will have a huge impact on many people’s routines. But nobody has banned walks or runs or hikes, as far as I know. Also, simply dancing with your kids or playing tag in the front yard or balloon volleyball in the living room can all be ways to get your heart rate going.

–Limit screen time, but be flexible. I know how tempting it can be, especially if you’re trying to work from home to just use the screens. And, on the one hand, I say, Please, please try to find alternatives. Kids are really good at making their own fun when you give them the chance and the right tools. But, it is also a time to be flexible. Try to pick shows or movies you feel good about and then let go a bit and realize your kids will be ok. Talk about plots and conflicts or movies at dinner time. Ask them what they learned on their favorite vlog. Have them write fan fiction or act out a scene. Too much screen time can be dangerous. But, making it work in a way that you can all feel ok about, isn’t a horrible thing during this time.

The list could probably go on and on as to what “key” things make a sane and happy day. (I haven’t even mentioned “social interaction” (whatever that is right now) and doing “the things that bring you joy” and all those…) But, the good news, in my experience, is that once I start to do even one of these things fairly well, the other areas usually have a way of magically falling into place. Not always, but often enough that I can trust it.

The Leprechauns

Posted on March 17, 2020 by keepinthesunlightblog@gmail.com

I first heard about the leprechauns when I was helping in a first grade classroom years ago. Those little mischievous guys and gals would sneak into the classroom at recess and lunch and mess with everything. They’d put all the chairs up on the desks or hang posters upside down. It was all rather silly. In fact, the students discovered many leprechaun tricks that we adults didn’t even know about. They were on the lookout for anything out of the ordinary.

The leprechauns do visit our house every St. Patrick’s Day; we invited them. They don’t get too elaborate, but the kids like their visit. The leprechauns write in green on mirrors and tubs and toilets (they find that green whiteboard markers work well). Mostly, they just leave tiny green footprints. Sometimes they write in their special leprechaun handwriting things like, “You can’t catch me!” All very silly.

Here are some other simple things the leprechauns do when we aren’t looking: (They have to be pretty obvious since our house usually looks pretty chaotic in its normal state…)

-put chairs backwards or on the table

-hang wall pictures or fridge pictures upside down

-put green (food coloring) in the toilets

-put our silverware upside down in the drawer

-hang calendars upside down

-put the pillows at the foot of the bed

-switch toothbrushes around

And so on. But what I love about our leprechauns is that they always clean everything up when they finally leave late St. Patrick’s Day night.

Ogre Enchanted

Posted on January 27, 2020July 18, 2020 by keepinthesunlightblog@gmail.com

Ogre Enchanted (2018)
by Gail Carson Levine

Ogre Enchanted tells the story of Evie, a young healer who refuses an unexpected marriage proposal from her best friend. A meddlesome fairy present at the time of the proposal doesn’t like such disappointments and casts a spell on Evie that turns her into an ogre. Now Evie has 62 days to secure (and accept) another proposal before she stays an ogre forever. Through her interactions with giants, ogres, dragons, and humans, Evie fights for her survival and battles between her healer instincts to help and her ogre instincts to harm, as she looks for a true love who can see past her hairy and smelly exterior.

20 years after Ella Enchanted, Ms. Levine has given readers a spirited, page-turning companion book. Ogre Enchanted‘s story takes place a couple years before the original book, and its epilogue leaves off just months before Ella’s birth. Fans of Ella will enjoy the references and connections between the two books, although, as these were obviously not written as a set, some forgiveness in details must be present. (I read one reviewer who was quite upset that Ella Enchanted had left out details that couldn’t have been written before its prequel was penned.) Ogre Enchanted is definitely for an older audience than Ella Enchanted, with some rather violent bits. Ms. Levine says her story was inspired by the Portuguese tale of “The False Prince and the True,” although many reviews also compare this book to “Beauty and the Beast.”

After my second read of this book, I really enjoyed doing a re-read of Ella Enchanted and found fun details and connections. Perhaps they weren’t all intended ones (such as the healer in Char’s group of knights possibly being Evie’s son…?), but I had fun searching, nonetheless.